VO-BB - 20 YEARS OLD!

[Frank F]

Tell me it isn't necessarily so...? ( I already know the truth, now it your chance to decide).

(Please remember, this is just in fun, and believe me - my Lady is a sweetheart - nothing like described herein. This is not meant to disparage anyone - I really do love the Ladies - yes, all of them - well maybe there is one or two...but I digress,,, no negativity intended. This is was simply placed here for a giggle. No more, no less.)

Toodles

F2


"Ten Immutable Laws of Marriage"

Law 1.
Marriages are made in heaven. But, so are thunder
and lightning.

Law 2.
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention
to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

Law 3.
Marriage is grand - and divorce is at least 100
grand!

Law 4.
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of
marriage,the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the
man listens. In the third year, they both speak
and the neighbors listen.

Law 5.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of one thing : Either the car is new
or the wife is.

Law 6.
Marriage is when a man and woman become as
one; The trouble starts when they try to decide
which one.

Law 7.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night
thinking about something you say. After marriage,
he will fall asleep before you finish.

Law 8.
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful,
understanding, economical, and a good cook.
But the law allows only one wife.

Law 9.
Marriage and love are purely matters of chemistry.
That is why a wife treats her husband like toxic
waste.

Law 10.
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that,
he is finished.

Bonus story:

A long - married couple came upon a wishing well.
The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in
a penny. The husband decided to make a wish
too. But he leaned over too far, fell into the well, and
drowned. The wife was stunned for a moment but
then smiled. "Wow!" she said. "This really works!"

_________________
Be thankful for the bad things in life. They opened your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before. email: thevoice@usa.com

[Brett Mason]

But, in the end, Men are just Happier...

Why Are Men Just Happier People?: What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.

You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station toilet because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $2000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $4.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache..

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Peace. Out.

(credit to someone named Bryan in England)