VO-BB - 20 YEARS OLD!

Monk · Posted: Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:39 am Post subject: Critique needed!

Hi all,

Ok, my first blush at my demo reel is here
http://monkeywork.com/p/VoiceOver.html

seeking input prior to making copies. I'll be putting together my character reel shortly. One step at a time.

Monk
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Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

Bruce · Posted: Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:15 am Post subject:

Much talent here, but let's try this...smoother transitions between clips (the first one cuts in mid-sentence and I can't think of a good reason why), kill the Football! clip (very few commercials require yelling these days), and make sure your three best cuts are at the top: Coffee, Eggs, 105.1 promo. The character bit with the sneezy cold is a bit overdone. Can you re-do it as a more realistic character? Real characters sell better that cartoony ones in a commercial demo.

Very good for a first demo. Maybe listening to a couple of dozen more demos from the big guys will give you inspiration. Go to voicebank.net, click on House Reels, and look for men's demos at some of the bigger LA and New York talent agencies.

Have fun,

B
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VO-BB Member #31 Enlisted June, 2005

I'm not a Zoo, but over the years I've played one on radio/TV. .

Monk · Posted: Wed Jan 14, 2009 2:48 pm Post subject:

Thank you! I can re-edit and re record anything quickly. The Sneezy spot went on air that way, but I can re-record it with less character.

I'll be checking out the links.

Thanks again!
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

Monk · Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 2:36 pm Post subject:

Ok, I've made some changes.

Should I cut the sniffle one?
http://www.monkeywork.com/p/VoiceOver.html

Thanks in advance for your review!
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

Bruce · Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 5:37 pm Post subject:

Much better. That should get you some work. Next trick, getting it into the right hands (ears).

Niggling point: I think you should avoid "dead air" between cuts...it's kind of jarring. Bring them closer together and if you can slide a small bit of the music or SFX of one clip under another and it sounds nice, I'd say do it. While I am not the paragon of demo production, you might want to listen to the first couple of demos on my website for how I edited the clips together. I think it keeps the pace and the interest up even when the deliveries are laid back. Opinions may vary, but I think it's the norm.

B
_________________
VO-BB Member #31 Enlisted June, 2005

I'm not a Zoo, but over the years I've played one on radio/TV. .

Monk · Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 9:08 pm Post subject:

my producer has said the same thing, keep it flowing.

stay tuned. and thanks a bunch, first drink is on me.

Monk...
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

Monk · Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:57 pm Post subject:

Ok, version 4 is up.
http://www.monkeywork.com/p/VoiceOver.html
I want to thank you Bruce as well as Mike and Dan for offering up ideas to tweak this.

Monk.
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

RD Levine · Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 5:51 pm Post subject:

I'm not an expert but here are my ideas. I would cut the radio promo out it's a commercial demo also drop the local tag on the Jaguar you want the demo to have a national sound and maybe move it it's very jarring transition (maybe its the sound F/X) from your money voice in the first two. These are a few things I found. I like the sniffle voice maybe just cut a bit different.
I know some of the spots may have gone on the air the way they are but that doesn't make them perfect for your demo.
Good Luck
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Ron Levine
http://www.ronlevinevoiceactor.com

Monk · Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 10:39 pm Post subject:

I'll be changing the sfx for the Jaguar spot, calming it down a bit.

what about the sneezy spot would you cut differently?
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com

RD Levine · Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2009 7:52 am Post subject:

Drop the local part I know that's part of the spot, but I think it could just be a water spot drop the gift certificate that's a very local sound. You could leave the brand but make it sound more national brand then a local water company.
Again just my 2 cents ask 10 VO's you will get 11 views. Even with my demo being produced by someone who does alot of them and is still working everyday in the industry as well as coaching and demo production there has been a suggestion of moving a few spots around.
_________________
Ron Levine
http://www.ronlevinevoiceactor.com

Monk · Posted: Sun Jan 18, 2009 2:00 pm Post subject:

I was thinking the same thing, edit out the local dealer, I'll see how it flows.

Thanks! I'll search out the picture of me as santa.
_________________
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me...

www.monksvoice.com