VO-BB - 20 YEARS OLD!

[DanG]

Just looking for some feedback and advice for this commercial demo.
http://soundcloud.com/dan-gough/dan-gough-commercial-demo


Thanks Dan

[cyclometh]

A few thoughts, in no particular order:

* It's a bit long. Commercial demos should be 1:00 or less (I had this beaten into me)
* I can hear a gate pumping on a couple of the pieces. Not bad, but it was noticable. Also, one of them was very sibilant- lots of s sounds and sounded really brassy.
* I didn't get the feeling that these were pieces of longer spots, but rather that they were done for the demo. Make the cuts shorter, use jump cuts and don't have any space in the reel that doesn't feature your voice in it. You want people to feel like they're hearing a small chunk of a larger piece, even if they're not.
* I didn't feel like these were your "best" voice in some of the pieces. Were you getting strong direction while recording this?
_________________
Corey "Vox Man" Snow
http://voxman.net

[Bailey]

If each of the 7 clips were held at 7 or 8 seconds, you would have been well under the 1 minute mark. I clocked at least 5 or 6 seconds of music that was not accompanied by a voice. As Cory commented, just let them hear a small chunk or sampling. Don't try to fit an entire idea into a few seconds.
_________________
"Bailey"
a.k.a. Jim Sutton
Retired... Every day is Saturday, except Sunday.
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AOVA Graduate 02/2004 ;
"Be a Voice, not an Echo."

[DanG]

Hi thanks for the input here. For the demo a couple of the tracks were produced from my original commercial demo but I did not like all of the takes on it so I did most of the demo myself except for a couple of tracks. I know the Kohls add is silibant which I could try and fix myself or cut that piece and just leave just the ending on it which would be just the tag and that would shorten up my demo to maybe the 1:00 min mark which I haven't reworked yet. Other than that is it passable or do I need to put alot more work into it or scrap it and try again?

[Bob Bergen]

Hey buddy!

It feels like a demo. I hear you tying to sound "voiceover" and not organically connecting to the copy. It's announcery driven rather than personality driven. Even the best announcers out there are able to deliver the read combined with their unique and individual personality. It's the personality that will get you noticed, more so than the voice.

Also, there's too much establishing music at the top of most spots. You want it edited voice attached to voice attached to voice. The variety of your intent from spot to spot will show off your versatility. A music sting at the top shows off the music, not you. And, you need more perspective. I don't hear whom you are talking to. Without a partner, at least in your mind, you are just reading. Having an unheard scene partner to relate and react to and you are acting. It's all about acting.

Check out the demos from Chuck Duran at demosthatrock.com Compare not just the production values but also the reads of the actors to your demo. There's a connecting to the copy that I don't hear from yours. I think this will better demonstrate what I'm saying.

Keep it up. You are on the right track. Just need to take it all up a notch.

[DanG]

Thanks for the feddback everyone. Bob I really liked the way you explained things to me. It makes sense about the personality part which I really need to work on and the announcery sound is kinda my niche. I think I have that kind of big pushing voice which throws me into that announcer catagory. I guess I need to be a little bit more laid back and take into consideration to connect better to the copy. I did self direct and produced some of the spots myself which seems to show and makes me understand that I need to polish things up for myself and go back to the drawing board and rethink what I am doing.
Great stuff here and thanks for the insight Bob.

[Yonie]

Dan, even people with your timbre and dynamic have their own style. The first thing that pops into my mind are beer or car commercials. Every single one is different, but I have yet to hear an "announcery" sound from modern commercials. Local ones do not count