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A nip here and a tuck there

 
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roger
King's Row


Joined: 30 May 2007
Posts: 1064
Location: Central Kentucky

PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 7:32 pm    Post subject: A nip here and a tuck there Reply with quote

I reworked my narration demo using the advice gleaned here.
Have your way with me.

Here it is

I learn so much here
Much appreciated,
-roger
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Roger Tremaine
www.MyFavoriteVoice.com
http://rogertremaine.voices.com/
No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. AESOP (The Lion and the Mouse)
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Yoda117
M&M


Joined: 20 Dec 2006
Posts: 2362
Location: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 6:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Two things:

1) the BG tracks are too loud. I'm somewhat overwhelmed by those, and not by your voice. Trim it down just a tad.

Maybe I'm just getting old, but I'm hearing a lot of demos all over the place lately that have the background tracks recorded at levels way too high.

Meh, what do I know anyway...

2) the last spot has no bg track/tracks what so ever. I can understand why, but put something in there at a low level, I can think of several tracks which would have worked nicely in that regard Bitchin
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Philadelphia based Voice Actor

Blog - A man, a martini, and a lot of microphones
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Deirdre
Czarina Emeritus


Joined: 10 Nov 2004
Posts: 13023
Location: Camp Cooper

PostPosted: Wed Apr 09, 2008 6:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

There is TOO MUCH MUSIC in this demo. Narrations do not need all that crap, and you're hamstringing your reads with the extra aural distraction.

#1 Streetcars. Music not necessary. Your flow is not great— you're not managing to tell the story in this one. It sounds like you're reading aloud in English, but that's about it. It's what I call a "words on paper" read.

#2. Trail Riders. I liked this one— your use of accent was spiffy and the music was appropriate, altho' loud. I believed you were "one of the guys".

#3. Dolphin Script. Music not necessary. A words-on-paper read, and I know you can do better.

#4. Fort script. VERY NICE. I really liked this one, except for the overly majestic and completely unnecessary music. You sounded real, warm, genuine. Like you had something to share and were telling me a story, not merely imparting facts. Very wicked nice.

#5 Records. I liked the use of music and your Hot-shot 1960's DJ voice for this. Take me to the sock hop, Daddy-o! This one is a keeper.

#6. Abe Lincoln. KILL THE MUSIC. You nearly made it on this one, very nearly telling the story but you got too annoucery.

#7. Nice to hear something with no BG track, but this one is a downer of a script to end on.

Roger, you've got real ability! When you get connected with your material you are a different man altogether. The times you aren't connected are obvious, and you end up expending your energy on making the words sound pretty, rather than embracing the whole idea of the script and sharing it.

I'm looking forward to hearing more, my friend.
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